Why is there always a bad guy?

Remember when we were children and we would play games with our friends? In those games, there was always a good guy and a bad guy.

When we were teenagers and fall outs occurred, there was always a good guy and a bad guy.

Now we’re adults and when something bad happens, we always find someone or something else to blame.

My question is, why do we need a bad guy?

I recently got out of a seven year relationship and, already I can see that one of us is going to end up being the bad guy.

To a lot of people, that bad guy will probably be me. This is due to mistakes I’ve made in my past and, the fact that when we did have issues in our relationship, I didn’t tell people, so they only know his side.

As you can imagine, this is incredibly frustrating. But at the same time, I can’t go around telling people my side, because then it’s almost like I’m trying to bad mouth him and prove everyone else wrong.

Surprisingly, our split was quite amicable. However we have both dealt with it in different ways.

I’ve always been quite proactive and optimistic. Whereas my ex is not like that, so to him it looks like I’m completely fine, which makes me look like I didn’t care and so on.

Wouldn’t life be so much easier if people didn’t take sides? Or didn’t feel the need to blame someone for the wrongs in their life?

Maybe it’s time that we start taking control over our lives and, admit when something is our fault, rather than finding someone else to be the bad guy…


3 thoughts on “Why is there always a bad guy?

  1. Storytelling needs conflict, and many conflict requires a protagonist. But it can be harmful when that thought process bleeds into the complexities of real life, like your mentioned break up.

  2. soilluminateme says:

    I am so sad to hear that you are going through this, know that I am thinking of you! Sending loves of love and hugs! It does not mean you care any less, It just means you have taken a healthy route to healing and that healing may take time. I know of a marriage that broke down and the route to healing was similar. She stayed quiet, respected their relationship and remembered it for the good – vowing to be there should he need her. He bitched, cried in public and made a huge song and dance about it. She was public enermy no.1 for a short time but months on, its actually swung the other way. Its sad that society requires a bad guy. You know where I am if you need a natter and I hope you find lots of happiness in the near future xx

  3. ubenmaat says:

    Ianthecool is right about why bad guys are needed in fiction, but when it comes to reality I think it’s because it’s far, far easier to blame some “other” for your problems than to accept that you may be the one causing them.

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